What If We’re Doing It All Backwards?
Jeni wants her ten-year-old, Timmy, to be more obedient and responsible. What parent doesn’t want this? So when Timmy disobeys, and doesn’t take responsibility to clean up the kitchen as assigned on his chore chart, she enters the all too common battle of wills to get him to do his job.
Teenagers, Sass, and Life That Is Truly Life
“Are you going to help me or not?” I snapped at Daniel, our fifteen year-old-son. He’d been asking for the past hour to go to a friend’s house. I kept dodging his request while also badgering him to enlist his help in a backyard project I had planned. “Dad, you’re annoying!” he snapped back. “You […]
One of Our Biggest Parenting Mistakes…
One of our biggest parenting mistakes is to try to get kids to behave right for the wrong reasons. It’s a good thing to want our kids to behave responsibly and to internalize the value of responsibility, but parents tend to turn this desire into a goal for a child’s behavior. Here’s how it works: […]
What’s Your Child Really Saying?
It was the first warm day of spring in Minnesota, which usually means MUD. The ground was still soggy from the snow melt, but the air was clean and fresh and the flowers were just beginning to peek through the soil. I was outside with two of our three kids…
Is My Anxiety Holding My Child Back?
You have good desires for your kids. You probably want them to learn neatness, diligence in homework, good eating patterns, and all sorts of other helpful habits. But if you are anxious as you try to help them learn better habits, that anxiety often makes it harder for everyone, and your kids are more likely […]
“How Do I Get My Kids to Do What I Want?”
“No matter how hard you try, you simply cannot control another person’s behavior. You can only influence it.” ~Dr. Scott Larson from “When Teens Stray” Parents often ask us, “How do I get my kid to do what I want them to do?” This question indicates that parents may be a bit more controlling than […]
7 Practical Tips for Picky Eaters
Regroup & Resolve
Every parent fails to deal perfectly with every parenting situation. In other words, we all screw up sometimes! Along the way we’ve discovered that what’s far more important than handling every parenting situation perfectly is to regroup, and resolve well. For it’s in resolving well that parents and children best learn and grow from their […]
Do Warnings Teach Kids to Be Less Responsible?
When dealing with a misbehaving child, many parents follow this pattern: instruction, warning, warning, last warning, really strong last warning, angry explosion!! When we stretch out our instructions into multiple warnings and don’t follow through, it teaches our children to feel insecure under our guidance. If a child gets lots of warnings because a parent […]
What to Do When We Blow Up
As hard as we try to parent like God would, we are human, and sometimes we mess up. We lose our cool, we speak harshly, or sometimes we even blow up at our kids. See how one mom handled her blow-up: The boys wouldn’t stop fighting. When Garrett finally hit his brother I got […]